Stay staunch, be strong and just do it!

Other than last weeks taster session on the track it's been six months since Ade or I rode on the track. Ade because he was sent to China and me because time has slipped away from me. Just after Ade left I finished my accreditation to ride the track, the last stage in a difficult journey assessing your competence (yes I did pass). So, having ridden a hard 40 the day before we went to complete Ade's accreditation. [I mention all the previous because I am a cyclist and its mandatory to give your excuses before you begin]. Those of you who know Ade will know he is a fixed wheel aficionado for whom the derailleur is the work of the devil though he does enjoy its guilty pleasure now and again. So tonight was a special occasion akin to receiving a Nobel prize.

The session is two hours long with a fast pace throughout.The evening started with fifteen minutes of warm up. Inevitably on the track this ends up as a high speed through and off with the pace picking up every lap for around 40 laps. It's then a quick [complicated] briefing before doing the lumps and bumps. This is a steady ride going up and down the banking including the steep bits. Those of you who have seen the track will know the gradient and can imagine the torture to the legs. Still-only about eight laps. Next is the official through and off; one lap on the front before shooting up the bank and coming down to join the rear of the group, each of the fourteen riders going twice so another 28 laps (starting to build and warm up now). We then did half laps but only one go each so another 7 laps.

Things started to get complicated now, from a single moving line the even numbers stayed on the inside while the odd numbers formed an inner line so two lines of seven hurtling round the track another dozen laps into the legs. Then, get this, the front inner rider accelerates up to front of the outer row while the rear rider drops back into the inner line so constantly moving in a clockwise circle. Head hurts. Then it was moving off the front in pairs, both front riders shoot up the track together and rejoin at the back - another 28 laps.

Then the fun really started. Two groups of seven ride at a recovery pace half a lap apart and at the whistle each front rider sprints to join the rear of the group in front another 40 laps into tired legs - awesome.

That was the main part done it was a mock (yeah right) race next. 10 laps at a high pace coming through and off to the rear each lap, build it right up to race pace for the next five then its everyone for themselves for the last five. I actually had a race plan. 'stay third wheel until the last lap then go flat out'. Yeah right. As the five laps to go sign came up I was in second place and the person in front slowed down. I was forced into the front and immediately came up with the most stupid plan. Go flat out for five laps or 1250 meters. I managed 31/2 laps and everything stopped working as the bike went into reverse. At this point I refer you to my previous excuses. We both thoroughly enjoyed the shoulder to shoulder barging on a bike though.

Finally 'the Sir Chris Hoy experience' The derny. The little moped went out with 14 riders and rapidly built to 40kph for a lung busting, breath through every orifice, 36 laps (9 kilometres). The closer you got to the Derny the easier, though still difficult, it became. Incredible experience and certainly takes your speed up.

That was it, a bit of feedback to all the riders and I am pleased to say we both passed. I was panicking in case they took it off me!

Ade is still on a high 24 hours later [OK me too]. It was a tough session but you learn more than you would believe going through the process. We would both recommend anyone tries it and we are more than happy to join you, though as accredited riders we may have to flush heads in toilets or perform wedgies to new arrivals.

The smuggest you will see Ade

Never happens at football matches.....

Following Wirral Mamil Ade's extended trip abroad he needs to complete the final phase of the accreditation process at the Manchester Velodrome. Having been away so long, before participating in the structured assessment, we decided to go and join a taster session. For those of you who are yet to enjoy the sheer pleasure of sprinting round the boards, for just £10 you get an hour on the track with a coach, bike and helmet provided. Great value for money.

Before going in we had a look round the new shop at the velodrone. Plenty of bling there and the staff are not too pushy. I fancied an aero helmet but I'm not too sure it provides a significant advantage below 12mph.

Once in the track or 15 minutes before it was our session we had a chance to watch some of the British team practising sprints. They are flying round and certainly inspire us mortals. When it came to our turn there were only two people who hadn't ridden the track before so the rest of us were free to practise some through and offs for an hour of high speed cycling, it was certainly good to get the machine back out. Although both Ade and I have spent many hours on a track, the thrill of riding so close to the tyre of the bike in front heightens your awareness of everything around you, improves your pedalling technique and your speed. Not to mention the feeling of stupidity at the lack of brakes [and in my case gears]. I don't think either of us will grow up and loose the excitement of riding a track.

After an hour I felt as though I should leave the track shuffling backwards with my nose to the floor as the Royalty of cycling including Sir Chris Hoy and Jason Kenny started their training behind a motorbike. For a while we gloated at the speed they were doing; much less than ours until the warm up finished and we were stunned into silence.

Exiting the tunnel we bumped into Poppa and Mrs Hoy who were leaving the track for lunch, after exchanging a few pleasantries about Sir Chris's performance in London we joined them for lunch. OK they were two tables away and didn't know they were having lunch with us but we did. The cafe had so many potential Olympic athletes from both the track and BMX it was a pleasure just to soak up the positive atmosphere. Ade even pointed out Bob from Emmerdale, though I have to take his word for it. He is apparently doing something on a bike for sport relief and was picking a bike up.

So that was it, you don't get day's like that at the football ground ......

Cycling season starts again

It's easy to get carried away with cycling at this time of year, the weather has been exceptional with records being broken for both temperatures and outdoor mileage. Combine that with British success on the track in the new pringle in London, Cav hitting the line first all over the place and the spring classics hitting the screens it's easy to think it is the middle of the season again.

Fortunately the British weather has a habit of bringing us crashing back down to earth. In Wirral Mamil Ade's case quite literally. This weekend was Polocini's winter sprinter. A 60 mile sportive near to the affluent area of Altringham (or for those that know the area and want to be more precise Wilmslow, Alderly Edge, Lymm, Knutsford and Hazel Grove). The event manages to find 2594 feet of climbing including the infamous Swiss Hill.

With the week before suitable for sunbathing and many riders getting their shorts out early it was easy to get carried away with the event.Polocini know how to run an event and all for a reasonable £20(more on that later). Having woken up to torrential rain and temperatures hovering above freezing, not to mention gale force winds my first thought was 'roll over and miss it'. That's the [great] thing about riding with others. No-one wants to say you are being stupid and cancel it. So I met up with fellow Wirral Mamils Ade and Paul and headed off in the team bus/Renault something.

45 miles of driving later and it was still hammering down and 3degrees. However, Allen from policini greeted us warmly at the village hall and we were soon carried away with the atmosphere of the event. There was free fresh coffee on arrival, porridge with fruit and our race packs of three gels and three energy bars. Having won the award for the biggest moaner we set off a little after 9 into what was the quietest sportive I have ridden with most people just gritting their teeth against the cold and rain.

The great thing about sportives though is, they are non-competitive and you can sit in with other groups, enjoy the scenery and 'normally' a chat about cycling. The first thirty miles are what I would describe as undulating, a great warm up for what was to follow. The scenery included some great car dealerships such as Aston martin, rolls Royce and some others too expensive to name. With the pedigree of motor vehicle available I was shocked to see Ade having a close look at a BMW X1. That was until I realised it had turned left in front of him and knocked him off his bike. Only his quick reactions  saving him from more serious injury. The driver felt so guilty he took off at high speed without stopping, (No wonder they get scratched) picking himself up Ade rode on with a stiff leg and a stream of expletives only his navy chums would understand.

Anyway back to the ride, Paul was riding his longest ride in many months after coming back from injury and straddling a Chinese frame weighing less than a 150 page novel. So no sympathy for him- on we rode. With respect to Ade for riding his Fausto Coppi up some of the most difficult climbs Cheshire has to offer. For those of us unaware, Coppi was one of the most prolific winners of bike racing in the early, fixed wheel days of the Tour D'France. Ade left his carbon Italian babe at home and lugged his heavy vintage machine up the hills before disappearing off the front charging down hills. Some say he was on a pilgrimage to the great men in recognition of his achievements. I have thought about it long and hard and know he is just nuts.

Just after the 30 mile point you hit the infamous Swiss Hill included in the 2010 tour of Britain. It's not that long but is covered with large cobbles and mud.

Add to this the downpour plus the 18% gradient and, to put my sulky head on, it's just not fair. Sit back and the the front wheel leaves the ground, stand up and the back wheel spins. It's not if you will get off but when. A few triples made it but the rest of us managed the first bit, realised what was happening and elected to walk. Just before the top I managed to ride the last section before plummeting down the reverse of the climb including the cobbles. Having survived and feeling good it's a left turn and a similar climb for close to a mile minus the cobbles. This was the way the ride went for the next 25 miles-torture.

I have to mention the feed station though at about 36 miles it included hot coffee, an energy drink top up (have I mentioned the free bottle) flapjacks, bananas, chocolate, in fact it was more like a sweet shop. With the finish just five miles away for the short course riders we debated continuing and of course pushed on for the sixty.  The hills continued to torture until about five miles to go when it felt like the rest was downhill (more or less). It was over and 25 minutes quicker than last year. After a quick change in the car park and loading the bikes up it was back to the hall for a recovery drink, black pudding, sausage and mash, Mr Kiplings trifle cakes and bananas. the food of athletes.

All in all the best sportive available I strongly recommend a look at his site and, if you fancy a sportive these are the ones to do. 

www.polocini.com